I never really paid attention to that feeling before.....until today. I had to stop myself and ask myself just exactly what was so important that I had to cut my workout short. And the answer was.....absolutely nothing! There was nothing in my day that had to be done or even really needed to be done. In fact, if I had wanted to just turn around and go home and do absolutely nothing the rest of the day.....except for changing David occasionally and making sure everyone ate.....I was good! The realization of what was fact and what was just nonsense my brain was taunting me with.....immediately calmed me down. I could literally feel myself relax and I did my entire workout without another anxious thought.
The realization of what I am doing to myself and those around me is quite eye-opening. I think I am in need of some form of relaxation therapy or at the very least....some new coping skills. I'm thinking perhaps a good yoga class might help. You know.....I just can't help but wonder how I went from being someone who when I was younger never let anything bother me to the raging anxiety nazi I am today? I never used to stress about anything and I never stressed whether anybody else did anything either. Some might call that laid back....but the truth is I was just lazy. Now though, that I don't have the luxury of being laid back or lazy.....it as if my mind is in a constant state of overload. Who is this stressed out....anxiety ridden....basket case who has inhabited my body....and how can I get her to leave? How can I find a happy medium between the me of yesteryear and the me of today? Arrrrrgggghhhh!
I am thinking I will be looking into yoga!