The Next Seven Days

Diets. They are the downfall of my self esteem and all that is good and holy in my life. If you have read this blog before, you will know that in my lifetime, I have tried many different diets/lifestyle changes/implements of torture. All of them work for awhile, but they are all only as good as the user and this user has issues.

The last "diet" I was on, was Trim Healthy Mama (THM). Now don't get me wrong, it is really a good lifestyle and I lost weight on it, but it definitely is not without it's problems. THM is very close to the KETO diet and it has a lot of sound healthy things going on within it. It is really good for people with gluten issues and those who are diabetic. It is a great way to get sugar out of your diet and to get your metabolism going. What it isn't for me is, doable for life. 

Forget that THM has you in the kitchen most of your day because everything is basically made from scratch and they insist that you eat every three hours, but after a year or so, I simply couldn't stomach the food anymore. Perhaps it was the six meals a day....everyday for 365 days or maybe it was just using the same combinations of food and the same seasonings in different ways. I don't know, but after a while, I just simply could not eat the main course meals anymore. I have talked to others who were also THM converts and they too had similar complaints, so it wasn't just me and my inner rebellion against diets.

It has been six years since I first started it, and although I have gone back and restarted several times, after the last time, my body just refused to try again. I literally started getting sick at the smell and the taste. That is not to say though, that I didn't learn a lot from the program and that it didn't leave some positives in my life.

First of all, I totally gave up diet Mt. Dew. That was an expensive blessing that I wasn't sad to see go. I also learned a bit about my metabolism. I found my new favorite drink that is actually healthy. I really did learn a new appreciation and love for cooking and I learned about some Vitamin C based drinks that truly help to ward off illness during the cold and flu season. There are a lot of other positives that came from the experience, but just like with any healthy eating venture, if you quit doing it, it quits working.

This year for me, like for many of us, has been a challenge so far. Between the mental and the physical along with the constant upheavals locally and all around, it has been really hard for me to find balance. I am a huge feelings eater and lawdy have I had feelings! I have also gone through trying prescribed diet pills (yes, I was that up in my feelings) as well as having all of my upper teeth pulled and getting dentures that are still a work in progress. It has been months of ups and downs both in life and my weight. Add in some emotionally heavy and very dramatic situations that have hit very close to home and my heart and I am what the text books would call....a freaking mess.

So in the last couple of weeks, I have done a bit of thinking about where I am at and where I actually want to be. The two seem miles a part at this point. Would I like my thighs not to rub together when it's 90 degrees out? You betcha, but more than that, I would like to be healthy both physically and mentally and if my years have taught me nothing, it is that the two go hand in hand. You really need a balance of both to be truly healthy. That is when I decided to get real with myself and form a plan. As many diets as I have been on, I know that "a diet" or anything even remotely referencing "a diet" is not going to work for me. I also know that diet pills prescribed or otherwise, aren't the answer either. I felt like total crap the whole time I was on them. So if neither of those are the answer...then what is? Truthfully, I don't know, but I do know that I have enough knowledge on the subject thanks to THM, that I can sort of point myself in the right direction.

I actually do have a new found love of cooking and not just cooking, but the whole cooking from scratch thing. I learned from THM, the value and importance of knowing exactly what goes into your food. The extra additives in boxed or prepared foods are not only unhealthy but can also be part of why it is hard to lose weight. I have also gotten more adventurous in the last few months and started trying new foods and recipes. I'm actually not a horrible cook. Who knew? With all of this cooking though, there has also been a fair amount of eating going on too. So how do I cook the foods I want to and eat the foods I cook and not outgrow everything in my closet? After doing quite a bit of reading...and a few tips from THM....the key seems to be portion control and trying not to eat a lot of carbs and fats together. The concept for me is a work in progress but it does make me more conscious about what I cook and how I put foods together.

Of course as we all know, losing weight or more importantly....being healthy, is not just about what we put into our bodies. It is also about how we treat our bodies. Inactivity is unhealthy in any body regardless of size. Our bodies need movement to keep muscles and joints supple and working, They need exercise to properly oxygenate our organs and keep them functioning to the best of their ability. A sedentary body is a body ripe for injury, illness and mental health issues. It's true. The more active you are, the better off you are both mentally and physically. The only problem here is that I am not a huge fan of exercise. I really had to weigh (no pun intended) my huge love of eating over my huge dislike of exercise. The result? Balance. I can actually have my cake and eat it too, if I am willing to throw a workout or two in the mix to balance it out. Oh the sacrifices we make for love....of food.

When I began talking with myself about exercise, a million reasons why exercise did not fit into my life, started to bloom in my garden of excuses. Honestly, my life is pretty non-stop busy from the time my feet hit the floor until I go to bed, especially with David, the grand kids, the house, the laundry, the cooking and the yard. I stay pretty active all day, but there is active and then there is healthy exercise active. Since there are only so many hours in the day, I decided that the best way for me to get exercise in, is to combine it with my already busy household routines. To start with, on the days when I mow and workout in the yard, there is already some healthy activity going on there and if we are counting steps, by the time the yard is finished, I have put in a good 8000 steps on the yard alone. Add to that the bending down over and over to pick up the yard before mowing and the bending and stretching with various other yard activities and that is a pretty fair workout for the day. One day though, is not enough. So I had to get creative.

I can't really afford the luxury of a gym membership and in the best of times, I am pretty much a homebody. Since COVID-19 though, I am darn near a recluse and I kind of like it that way. I am willing to venture out several times a week and go for a 30 or so minute walk and when I have to go to the grocery store, I do consider that part of my walk regimen, but still I needed more....so I have decided to try and make my house....my gym. My house has two sets of 13 step stairs. One is to go up to the second story and one is to go to the basement and I climb up and down those steps at least 10 times/day. I have decided to double that and each time I have to go up and down with a purpose, I will add and additional up and down as part of a workout. I have also decided that since I manage to go in and out of every room in my house at least 3 times each day, that I am going to assign 15 reps of a given exercise in each room. For instance, in my room I have a big exercise stability ball. Each time I enter my room, I do 15 crunches on the ball. If I go in the upstairs bathroom, I do 15 jumping jacks. The living room is 15 push ups and in the laundry room I have dumb bells and I do 15 reps of different arm lifts every time I enter the room. Each room either has some kind of workout equipment such as bands or the stability ball or in the rooms that don't, I just do some sort of exercise that doesn't require equipment.

I tested this technique out a bit last week and really liked it and felt like I accomplished something without having to make a lot of extra time to workout. Starting tomorrow I will try to be absolutely dedicated to it for the the next seven days. I am also going to be dedicated to eating what I want, but paying attention to the portions, and as a side note, I am also going to make it a rule to not eat after 6 p.m. It is proven that this helps with weight loss and also makes it so that you don't have acid reflux all night. That is win/win in my book.

If you notice I said that I am dedicated to all of this for the next seven days. I figure that I can do anything for a week. At that time I can see how I feel, what the scales show and if I think this particular plan works for me. If it's not working, then I can change it up and figure out if I need to scale back more on the portions or add to the workouts. At any rate....it is a start and without a starting point, you can't take the next best step in the direction you need to be going.

The world doesn't appear that it is going to be settling down at all any time soon and with all that is going on, it would be very easy to succumb to the negativity both mentally and physically. The bottom line though is that the world is not responsible for taking care of me. That is my journey, my obligation and my choice as to whether I want to be the best me I can be or if I want to be a reflection of how unhealthy the world currently is. Only I can change me....so let's see what happens.  

Taking the Ick Factor Out of the Five Year Test

Fear. I know the feeling well. The fear of illness is currently one of the top five fears in the world. It is not so much the fear of catching something and recovering, it is the fear of catching something and ultimately succumbing to it. The fear of something catching us off guard and changing both our long term and short term plans for our lives can literally be debilitating.

Funny, but during this whole COVID-19 thing, I have never felt fear. Maybe it is because I have done my research and know what to look for and have a plan of action for both myself and my family should it become a reality in my home. I am also aware, that while statistically my special needs son would be at the greatest risk if COVID made its way into my house, I am likewise aware that as a whole, my family is not at great risk for dying from it. Truthfully, at least in my world, there are many illnesses out there that are far scarier and far more life threatening to myself and my family. We have a family blood line full of Lupus and other various and no less treacherous auto immune diseases as well as an active cancer gene(s) that has made its way through, randomly effecting some while  bypassing others.

Today though, I am here to talk about cancer and one cancer in particular.....colon cancer. Now cancer in and of itself, is an indiscriminate bully. It does not care what color you are, what ethnicity you are, how rich you are or how well you think you take care of yourself. And while it does tend to have a slightly higher tenancy in men than women, it is not gender exclusive.

Getting older, while a gift......as not everyone is afforded the privilege, it is not without its speed bumps and even a few giant hurdles. As our body ages, so do our cells, vessels, bones and organs and our bodies become far more susceptible to injury and disease. To stay on top of this susceptibility, starting at about 40, we have to start putting our bodies through testing that at times "feel" nearly as awful as the disease we are trying to stay on top of.

At 50, if we have had no major health issues prior and we aren't aware of any major family history of colon cancer, then most people are advised by their doctors to have a colonoscopy every five years. As preventative tests go, it is one of the more unpleasant ones, but also one of the most life saving tests you can have. But I'll talk more about that in a moment. For now, I will tell you what brought me to write this particular blog piece.

Last week, in the throws of all the COVID-19 lock down stuff, I had a scare. And under the mantle of too much information, I will tell you that the scare was blood in my stool. I dare to be so open about this because often people don't know what they need to be looking for so they ignore signs and symptoms. Because of my family history, I knew that this was something I needed to discuss with my doctor. It was funny too, because my last colonoscopy was in 2015 and I knew it was time for another one, but my plan was to wait until the lock down was over. Apparently God and my doctor felt differently.

After several days of having bright red blood and no knowledge of hemorrhoids or any other such issue, I decided that I better call my colorectal specialist (if you have heavy cancer in your family....you have one of those). His receptionist said that with the lock down, he was only doing emergency surgeries until June, but she wanted to check with him before scheduling me. Within a few minutes his nurse called me back and I was on the schedule for April 15th. There was something ironic about it being tax day....don't you agree?

Now here is where I tell you, if you haven't already experienced it, that when you have an issue that makes you concerned about having cancer and you are waiting on testing or results, it can take a toll on you mentally and emotionally. Most of us have known or loved someone with cancer and that is not a road any of us wishes to go down if we can keep from it.

Since this was not my first cancer scare, and with everything else going on in the world right now, I diligently and deliberately focused my attention on all that I could control in my life and left what I couldn't control to God. The week went by fairly quickly but as the day drew closer, fear did creep in here and there....after all I am human. Now THIS is where I am going to interject and say that many cancers, and especially colon cancer, are not caught early because of fear. 

No one wants to get a cancer diagnosis, but a stage one or two cancer diagnosis, where the cancer is caught early and is far more treatable is much preferable, than a stage three or four diagnosis where doctors are working against time and a disease that is continually progressing and the odds are much less in your favor. However, even with this rational reasoning, fear is irrational and sometimes it is the irrationality of the fear that keeps people from getting tested and staying on top of their health. They live by a "what I don't know won't hurt me," mentality when just the opposite can be very true. Fear is a powerful immobilizer and in this case.....fear can kill you. 

Another reason that many put off or refuse testing for colon cancer is because of the test itself. Let's face it, it is not a test we really want to think about or talk about and if you have never had one, but only heard horror stories, then stepping up to the plate that first time can be almost as scary as the cancer itself. So let's do some real talk here.

First of all let me say that I totally get the ick factor in all of this. The truth is, we ALL have rectums and colons and many people out there have issues relating to both. We all poop! We also all have issues one way or another with pooping at some point in our lives and if we take care of ourselves like we are supposed to, by the time we turn 51, ALL of us should know what a colonoscopy is all about. Sadly, though, that is not the case, so maybe by writing this, I can take some of the grossness out of this, some of the fear and some of the stigma out of talking about colorectal disease.

Just an FYI, colonoscopies not only detect cancer, but they also detect a myriad of other diseases that can mess with your stomach, your bowels and your over all health. For some, colonoscopies start when the individual is much younger than 50, in the hopes of detecting irritable bowel syndrome, gluten disease and diverticulitis to name a few. Colonoscopies are also started earlier than 50 when there is an alarming rate of colon cancer in your close family tree or if you have done genetic testing and you have been found to have the colon cancer gene (there will likely be more on that in another blog piece at another time.) Normally though, in a normally healthy individual, colonoscopies begin at 50 and are done every 5 years after that until the age of 80 and from there, as prescribed by the doctor.

So you have heard the horror stories about the dreaded colonoscopy, but what are the facts? The facts are that the worst part of the scope is not the procedure at all, but the prep for the procedure. In order to have a colonoscopy, as you can well imagine, your colon must be clean and clear. This means that what is in there, must come out. About noon the day prior to your procedure, you start on clear liquids, no food and absolutely nothing RED to drink. Then about 6 p.m. and then again at 9 p.m.,  you get some truly nasty crap to drink. Mine came in two bottles. You mixed the bottles with 16 oz of water and had to drink it at the respective times. You are basically drinking the most awful tasting laxative of your life. The reaction time from drinking to making yourself comfortable on the toilet is about 30 minutes and depending on what resides in your colon, this can last from several hours to the entire night. Now while unpleasant (diarrhea is never fun), this part isn't too bad. A few magazines, a good book or a well charged cell phone and you just wait it out. The absolute worst part though is the ingesting of that laxative. For me, the first bottle went down okay, but the second was a bit dicier as I was worried that there would be puking involved too. What I figured out on the second one was that since you can't just shoot 16 oz like a shot, you can spread out the large gulps over about half an hour and if you drink water in between each gulp, it makes it much easier. Once the laxative is down, the worst is over. 

By the time you head to your procedure appointment, your colon is clean and other than feeling a bit dehydrated, you really don't feel too bad. They usually have you arrive an hour before your procedure and make sure you have someone to drive you home as you are under anesthesia for the procedure. Once there, they bring you back and have you strip completely naked and put on a gown. They then take you to pre-op where they administer an IV and also some fluids to replace what you have lost. Now for those of you who panic at needles, there is no real easy way around this, but I will say that most of the nurses who start IV's for surgeries are very good at what they do and the stick is far less painful than you might imagine.

Once the IV is in and the fluids are going, you simply lay there and wait your turn. When they wheel you back, they turn you on your side and the anesthetist says.............  I have no idea what they say because I am usually out by then. In what feels like seconds you are waking up back in post op and the doctor has already filled your driver in on the health of your colon. From that point you wake up, get dressed and go home. They recommend you eat and drink light for the rest of the day and by the next day, it's like nothing ever happened. And THAT my friends is a colonoscopy. 

During the procedure, they will be looking for polyps or lesions that could be cancerous. They will usually remove any polyps they find during the procedure and biopsy any lesions they find. All are sent for pathology and in cases such as this, you may have a delay in your diagnosis. In most cases though, the procedure lasts about 30 minutes and you have results before you walk out. Blessedly, my case turned out to be diverticulitis (an inflammation of the bowel) which had caused the bleeding. It is a light case and easily treatable. Had it been something more though, since in most cases colon cancer is slow growing and since I am fastidious about getting my testing done, I would likely have caught it early and it would have been very treatable.

So yeah, getting older in some cases sucks, but knowledge is power and taking control of your own health and being pro-active can be the difference literally between life and death. I truly hope that for those of you who have never had the test and didn't feel comfortable talking about it with others, that this has helped you. For those that are putting it off, STOP! It is a few hours of discomfort for five years of peace of mind.

If you want more information about colorectal cancers, the disease, the statistics and the facts, please check out the American Cancer Society on Colorectal Cancer. I hope you will take this to heart and take care of you and share this to help take care of others because......CANCER SUCKS!

So......I Did a Thing!

I haven't given this blog much love recently. Well, today's topic seemed to fit on my health and wellness blog just right.

So....I did a thing. Before I fully disclose though, I need to give you a bit of a back story.

I was born in the 1960's and in my opinion.....dental care in my part of the country between the late 1950's and the early 1980's was little better than that in current England. Now I could be wrong, but my experiences with the dental profession have not always been anything to write home about.

As a kid, I was sick a lot with asthma which usually went into bronchitis and often times pneumonia. I was pumped full of medication from about the age of two, up until my late teens. These medications were not great for my teeth as some leached calcium and others just literally destroyed them with cavities regardless of the three times a day I brushed or the avoidance of sweets. To top it all off, the cavities I seemed to have developed every six months were filled with big silver fillings that stuck out like a sore thumb and I learned later in life, would cause the tooth to eventually break around the filling.

As I grew into an adult, my teeth became less and less a reason to smile. Now, I am not blaming it all on dentistry or meds, because every time I was pregnant, one of my favorite cravings was ice. No...not the crushed stuff, but actual cubes which I could chomp on. Four pregnancies later and my teeth had tiny fractures developing all through them. Apparently what vintage dentistry and pharmaceuticals didn't kill in my teeth, my ice chomping finished off.

In the last few years, my teeth have become a nightmare. I have lost teeth and done the whole partial thing and spent literally thousands of dollars trying to keep what I had in tact. Recently though, my partial (which is a story all it's own) started breaking off. My mouth was in constant pain and I was having roots of my teeth growing almost into my sinuses. It has been miserable to say the least.

Living on a very limited income, my needs usually come a very distant last, but when you are in constant pain and being told that the constant infections your teeth are causing can cause life threatening outcomes, I had to pull myself up the priority line. After calling around, I found that even with my dental insurance, the work I was needing was going to cost anywhere between $3000 and $5000 and this simply was not even a possibility. Of course though, neither was dying because I left my tooth infection unattended. Finally, one of the dentist offices I talked to gave me the name of a dental facility that was for low income and worked on a sliding fee, so I made an appointment.

Now, this dentist I saw was awesome. She was a young woman not too many years out of dental school with a great seat side manner who seemed very knowledgeable with a gentle touch. After much consultation, it was brought to my attention that even on a sliding scale, filling in my spaces and fixing my partial was going to be far more than I could afford. It was also going to be a situation that even if fixed, it would not keep the rest of my teeth from needing further work and attention and costing me more. The bottom line....the most cost effective thing to do for my teeth was to simply pull them all and get dentures. It about made me cry but realistically and financially this was what it came down to. Neither the dentist nor I were 100% happy with this idea, because she said my gums were still in okay shape and my bone was great and as far as I was concerned, I wasn't ready to turn into my grandmother who was constantly hunting her teeth and scaring small children while she was looking. Okay....me! I was the small child she scared.

There was also the fact that even though dentures were the most cost effective, long term way to go, even on a sliding scale, it was going to be pricey. Luckily the offset would be that I would not be eating for awhile, so I could save some money there. Right?

So yeah.....that thing I did.....I decided to get dentures. 

When I make a decision such as this, I have learned that the longer I think about it, the less apt I am to carry through and since this was a long term health affecting situation, I didn't really have the luxury of time to mull it over. I did do a little research and talked to my dentist in depth. She said that they would start with my top teeth since my bottom ones were still okay for now. They would pull all of the teeth and then give them six weeks to heal and then fit me with dentures and it would be another four to six weeks before I got them. I talked to others who had done this and a few suggested I be fit with a healing plate as soon as my teeth were pulled, as this would keep my gums from shrinking and be easier on me in the long run. It sounded good to me. I talked this over with my dentist and she said they didn't do the healing plates for a multitude of reasons but I think the biggest reason was cost. She did give me the name of other dentists I could go to if I wanted a healing plate. I called and the whole procedure would cost two to three times what I was already paying and the healing plate alone would be an extra $800-$1500. So no healing plate for this gal.

Thursday January 30th was the day. I went in, sat down and prepared to lose all my upper teeth, my smile, my ability to say words without a lisp and perhaps some dignity in the process.

The procedure began with 14 deadening shots. Nine were on the outside and five were behind the teeth on the upper palette. May I just say, I have not had much in life physically that hurt worse than those last five. I don't usually cry at pain, but those suckers almost made me. Once I was good and deadened, the extractions began. There was no pain, but there was a lot of tugging, pulling, pressure and the horrid smell of burning enamel and cauterized flesh. The process took about 90 minutes and as I walked out with a prescription for 10 tramadol and a mouthful of gauze, it was a given that talking would be out of the question for the next 24 hours.

I did okay the first few days and even realized that I could care less if people saw me without upper teeth or not. Who knew? I am not nearly as vain as I thought I might be. The real issue around other people for me though, has been my ability to speak. I can't speak well and therefore, I try hard not to speak at all.

By the end of the first week, things were beginning to change and I started having more and more pain and bending over or cold air hitting my gums was excruciating. The roof of my mouth had started swelling and I was developing sore spots everywhere I had been stuck with the needle on my palette. They then began to start breaking open. I called the dentist and was started on antibiotics. The pain did not leave and I was not sleeping and by around 3 p.m. every day, my mouth would be throbbing. I was fast becoming a royal bitch and no one....including myself wanted to be around me. My pain meds were long gone and I was surviving on ibuprofen and tylenol. Four days later, the infection was obviously still a thing and the pain was worse so I ended up in the ER.  I had absesses where the five needle marks were. They ended up giving me a second antibiotic and said the infection was causing the pain. Lose the infection and the pain will be better. Sigh......

Today, I think it is beginning to be better. I can tell that the gums are starting to heal and although I still feel pain in my face and jaw, the swelling in the top of my mouth seems to be better. Perhaps we are now moving in the right direction.

If there is an upside to all of this, it might be that this is the most effective diet I have ever been on. I can't eat and even if I could, I likely wouldn't because the infection makes everything taste awful. I am surviving on water, the occasional smoothy and broth. I am sure as the pain subsides, other soft foods will be okay and taste better, but for now.....the I Have No Teeth and an Infection Diet are working wonders for my thighs.

In about a month, I will go back into the dentist and they will fit me for my dentures. It will be another chunk of sliding scale change up front and then I will get my dentures in another four to six weeks. I am told that the fun will not be over just then though. There will be trial and error once I get my new dentures as to the fit and my ability to learn to hold them in place, so actual eating may still be awhile off.

The dentist said after my dentures are where and how they need to fit, we may then have to talk about doing the bottom teeth. Wow! I just don't know. Perhaps though, if I end up being able to smile and talk again....not to mention eat, I may very well have a bottom set of dentures in my future. For now though.....we'll just wait and see.

So yeah.....I did a thing. I will keep you updated!