Not My....Best Week Ever

To put it bluntly....I sucked at THM during these last two weeks! But I am human and I am allowed to suck every once and awhile. This particular challenge has been much more challenging to me than the previous one. Life hit me with some unexpected changes and worries and I spent a good deal of these two weeks trying to deal with emotions. In the past, emotions have always been my downfall as that is when I usually reach for fast food and gummy bears. I am proud to say that neither passed my lips, but I did not do well on plan either.

Along with being all up in my emotions and fighting off McDonald's urges, I also found some Trim Healthy Mama items that can be described as nothing less than pure evil. That's right....I said EVIL! First there was Lily's Chocolate bars. I found a couple of variety's at a little store we have close by that sells a lot of the THM stuff. I knew after the first bite that I was going to have to watch myself....especially when I dipped them in Peanut Junkie Butter. Goodness it was amazing! It was a Reese's peanut butter cup without the sugar. Not over indulging became a real trick and I realized after my second bar, that buying these at this point in my journey was not in my best interest, so bye bye Lily's until I can actually behave myself and act like an adult around them and not a kid whose parents are away for the weekend. Sigh......

The other truly EVIL thing I discovered was the Trimtastic Cake. I switched out the zucchini and used yellow squash and switched out the chocolate with strawberries. I made it into cupcakes and I couldn't keep my hands off of them. Luckily, my family had similar feelings about them, so there weren't a lot left around to tempt me. It did however, take me only about 10 seconds to realize that these treats needed to be left for special occasions when many people would be around to help me eat them. Again....my addictive personality was kicking in.

Along with finding these new almost irresistible treats, I did a lot of fighting with my emotions which left me also fighting old patterns and habits. Rather than waiting the 3 hours, my afternoons and evenings sometimes had much less time between when I ate. And last Saturday was my worst day since I started this back in May. I ended up throwing the time table out the window and declared it a cheat day. The foods I ate were on plan and I really tried not to have any crossovers, but there was a lot more food in a lot less time span.

While I have tried my hardest to stick this week out and do my best.....my best hasn't been very good compared to the last few weeks. Oh....and there was that whole pesky exercise thing. Yeah....it didn't happen. I tried a couple of times, but the truth is....exercise was inconvenient in my schedule so rather than make myself a priority and make the time.....I kind of just.....didn't do it. Nope, it was not one of my finer couple of weeks.

Now the good news. Yes, there is good news.....at least I think there is. There has been one huge NSV (non-scale victory) in all of this and that has been the fact that I have not touched sugar and even with all my "bad" eating, I still couldn't make myself eat off plan stuff. Even on my worst day, I didn't reach for off plan candy, chips or fast food. That in itself is quite amazing! I also made sure that starting this next week/challenge, that my elliptical was ready to go and that my exercise time comes before anything else....whatever I have to do to make it work. I am not going to let bad habits and stress beat me!

I am not as happy with myself right now as I have been, but I do know that I have come too far to backslide and lose all that I have accomplished. Even though I have not lived up to what I know I can achieve, I know that I have changed a lot and I want to continue forward. Over these last few weeks, my idea of what is cheating has completely changed as well as how I view food and more importantly myself. I think once I get the exercise implemented just as strongly as the good eating habits seem to be, that my continued journey on this plan will be much more effective and my health benefits will just continue to increase.

So how did I do these two weeks after finding Lily's and Trimtastic Cake and not being faithful to my eating schedule? Well, I was prepared for anything this morning. Mostly I was expecting to see a gain, but amazingly.....I am exactly where I started two weeks ago. Normally this would be a bit disappointing, but today I am grateful that I don't have to re-lose weight I put back on because of "bad" behavior. Okay....not bad but definitely slightly naughty!

Today is a new day and while I haven't heard what the next challenge is yet, I know I am ready to continue this journey and I am prepared to give it 100%.

Life is not about perfection because we are imperfect beings. Life is about trying, sometimes failing.....and then picking yourself up and starting again. It is our failures that we learn from and there have been many lessons for me, both physically and mentally in these last couple of weeks. I am getting stronger and life's speed bumps don't cripple me like they used to. Will this be the last time I have a bad couple of weeks while working to lose my weight and become a better me? I sincerely doubt it, but hopefully the times will become less and less and each time they do come, I will be able to handle them better and better.

So my suggestion to all of you out there......Don't give up! Don't expect perfection from yourself because you will only set yourself up to fail! Simply do your best each minute of each day and always keep in mind that.....you are worth it!

Sorry...Not Sorry!

So this weeks blog almost didn't happen. Well....the blog would have probably happened, but I almost had decided not to share them anymore on the THM pages. Why? Because I got a private message last week after my end of challenge blog from a lady who told me "Please stop blogging and posting about every little detail of your weight loss. You are really over doing it and causing other mama's not to like you much." There was more to the message but that was the sum and substance of it. She felt I was oversharing and she was tired of it.

Now if someone were to describe me, "sensitive" would not be one of the first adjectives used. As a blogger of many years and someone who at one time was very involved in the political scene, you develop a pretty thick skin when it comes to personal attacks. I wouldn't really call this a personal attack, but it did make me stop and think. Was I oversharing? Was I too excited about THM and forcing it down others throats? I did back away from posting much on the THM Facebook pages this week, but after some careful thought and consideration, I decided BULL PUCKY.....Ima gonna share! So Message Mama, sorry.....not sorry! 

I share because of two reasons. The first is that if someone hadn't shared....and shared......and shared with me, I might never have ever heard of THM or be where I am right now. Thank you Marni Wells Jones from the bottom of my now, much healthier heart. The second reason is, THM in the beginning stages is not easy. For a beginner it is confusing and frustrating and you feel like the worlds dumbest person trying to figure out S, E, FP and so on. Having someone out there who has been through the challenging first stages, stuck with it and who is having success, is often just the catalyst for others who are on the fence about whether to trudge ahead or give up and eat a cheesecake. This Celery Girls advice........trudge mama's! Please keep trudging!

As I read through the different THM Facebook pages, especially the beginners one, I really do see a lot of struggle and frustration from time to time. Trying to wrap your head around no numbers, NSV's, radishes as potatoes and cauliflower being everything from rice to a sauce is confusing. So today I want to answer some questions that I see pop up all the time. Now please note: I AM SPEAKING ONLY OF MY EXPERIENCE. I can speak to no one elses.

1) Do I have to read the books? No! Only if you want to understand the plan thoroughly is this necessary. HOWEVER, I suggest you have on hand both the original THM book and the THM Cookbook. As you will refer to them a lot!!!!! The funny thing is that as you progress on the plan, the original book makes more and more sense and I personally use my cookbook daily.

2) I am not social and don't get on Facebook a lot. Am I missing out on much by NOT joining the THM FB groups? YES! Some of my best information has come from these groups and the ladies who share questions, thoughts, ideas and recipes....not to mention their awesome lifestyle transformation stories. Nothing is more motivating than to see the before and after pictures of these women working to change their lives. As a side note: If not for the FB group THM - Challenge Group......I would not be sitting here writing this today!

3) I love bread. I do not understand why I can't have bread with my eggs on plan! You can have bread with your eggs on plan! Eggs are an S meal. There are S breads you can make up quickly in a mug, toast them and enjoy. You can also eat a piece of sprouted bread with your eggs and consider it a crossover, meaning you are mixing your carbs and fats. On occasion, that is perfectly fine, but if you make a habit of it....you might get a bit frustrated that the pounds don't shed as easily.

4)How can I do this? I have a family and I can't afford to make separate meals for them and me. So don't! I guarantee that at least 75% of the meals on plan are what I call "family pleasing" meals. This means that if you make Taco Time Taco's or Lazy Lasagna and don't tell them it is THM, they will eat it, love it and ask for more! I speak from experience on this!!!!!!

5) I made Lazy Lasagna. It was delicious, but I am still hungry. Can I have more? If so....how much? Yes. You can have more. The beauty of THM is freedom. If you work the plan correctly, you should never feel hungry or deprived. Sometimes though, we fnd ourselves hungrier than at other times. If you want more food....eat more food....within limits. I always jot down what I eat and if I eat extra at a meal. That way if I have a slow loss or no loss week or even a gain week, I can go back over what I ate and see where I can cut back or change things up for a better upcoming week.

6) Do I have to drink Good Girl Moonshine (GGMS)? I don't like the taste of the apple cider vinegar? Freedom! Freedom! Freedom! No...you do not have to drink it BUT believe it or not it helps your cravings, weight loss, over all health and most of all.....IT GROWS ON YOU! My first GGMS I nearly died. It was awful and I did not finish it. My friend though, encouraged me to look up recipes on Pinterest and play with flavorings and also to cut back to about a tsp. of ACV until I got used to it. I took her advice and found some GGMS that I really liked. From there I began making my own concoctions and never measuring the ACV (I know it is closer to a Tbsp per drink now) and now......I find it difficult to drink my drinks without ACV in them. I couldn't do this plan without my GGMS.

7) There is so much to drink between the GGMS, the sippers, smoothies, frappas, etc. Do I really need to drink all of this and if so, do I need to drink water too? Yes and yes! I know it sounds like a lot but your body does need most of this. I usually average 1-2/32 oz jars of GGMS, 1-2/32 oz jars of a sipper and 8 glasses of water a day. I also usually throw in a smoothie for either breakfast or a snack. The frappas? I use that as a special treat from time to time. The fact is, the GGMS and the sippers introduce healthy ingredients to your body and promote weight loss. The water is necessary for everything from your skin and other organs to your digestive track. Keeping hydrated is essential as many times we mistake hunger for thirst. My motto....Drink! DRINK! Drink!

8) Why does it seem that everyone else is losing weight and I am stalled or even gaining weight? I don't think THM is working for me! Bottom line, don't judge your weight loss by anyone elses. We are all unique and there are many factors involved as to how we lose weight. How much weight you have to lose, how much weight you have carried over a period of time, how much or little you work out, how strictly you stick to the plan, the time of the month, hormones in general, stress, chronic illness and genetics all play a part in our ability to lose and gain weight. I can tell you that before May 15, 2016....I was convinced that I could NEVER lose weight as I had lost and gained the same 10 pounds for over 15 years. I was giving THM one "all in" chance to see if I could lose weight by doing the Spring Fling Challenge. If I gave it everything and lost nothing or only a couple of pounds, I was resigned to a life of being overweight and unhealthy. I stuck to plan, stayed on track and got off my keester and started moving. I found out that I COULD lose and it was at a slow and steady pace. Be happy with your numbers, even if the weight only comes off in tiny incriments. All those little numbers add up in the big scheme of things and I am here to tell you.....if I can lose.....anyone can! 

9) I don't have a support system and people refuse to quit buying and eating junk off-plan foods around me. How can I possibly do this? Please know that I say this with as much love, respect and understanding as possible.....Put on your big girl panties and love you enough to make it happen! You ARE worth it! I guarantee that if you can stay completely on plan for 1 week, you will understand this. If your family doesn't support you, then turn to your THM groups. See if there isn't someone close to you in one of the groups who will buddy with you. If no one is close, then find a long distance buddy and call, chat, email and message each other. The THM groups have an abundance of support, but you have to ask for it. Don't give into failure before you even begin. If those around you insist on having snacks and unhealthy foods in the house, then ask them to keep them in their rooms or find a cabinet that is for THEIR stuff and know that it is off limits to you. In exchange.....give yourself a cabinet or space that is full of wonderful on-plan snacks and quick fix foods so that no matter what they bring in the house....you won't feel tempted. It does get easier....I promise!

10) Final question. How do I keep my kids out of my GGMS and my THM foods? I say....don't! It is never too early to teach our kids good and healthy eating habits. Kids are great immitators and if they see you drink or eat something, naturally they will want it too. I used to try and hoard my GGMS, my greek yogurt and my Peanut Junkie Butter from kids, until I realized that I was molding how they saw and ate food and that it would likely be with them the rest of their lives. They now eat what I eat. It is all about the ever changing perception of food and how we choose to make it a part of our lives.

So there you have it. My answers to frequently asked beginner questions. And yes, I am currently doing the No-Cheat Get Moving 2 week challenge. Today ends week one and although I have "moved" some and paid for it a bit, I have stayed on plan for yet another week. Each week gets easier as I find no reason to cheat, after all....just about anything can be THMized!

Now to today's weigh in. For the first time in weeks....I gained 2/10ths of a pound. I am good with that as I know my body is changing. It is all part of the process and because I keep track of what I eat, if changes need to be made, I will know exactly where to make them.

My final words to you this week.....Don't give up! You've got this! And most importantly......You are worth it!

When One Challenge Ends.....Another Begins......Thank You Chrissy Benoit!

And the Spring Fling Challenge is at end. If you remember it started May 15, 2016 and yesterday was my last full day (June 30, 2016). In that period of time I began working out, something I hadn't done in a very long time and I went "all in" with Trim Healthy Mama (THM).

Before I give you the numbers, let me tell you a little about what this challenge has done for my life....after all, I am far more than a number!

Since May 15th:

I have had minimal to no sugar (I say minimal because I am not a purist so I may miss reading a label or two)
I have eaten on-plan every day
I have taken my once beloved Diet Mt. Dew out of my mouth, my house and my life (I don't even crave it anymore)
I have proven to myself that activities that I "thought" I couldn't do, I can
I lowered my blood pressure
I was able to go a couple of days without my acid reflux medicine (something I never could do before)
My joints and feet no longer ache
I have fought off several sinus issues without the help of medical intervention
I have eaten desserts daily
I have never been hungry
I am down to maybe a couple of headaches during the month instead of 10-12
I am putting....tumeric, ginger, collagen, apple cider vinegar (ACV), lemon and other healing foods into my body
I have learned a love of cauliflower, radishes and even zuchinni and spinach
I can fit into a smaller size clothes
I don't get winded as much
I can cross my legs comfortably
And most of all........I FEEL BETTER!

I can honestly say that this challenge has been the best thing that has happened to me in a very long time.

So now for the numbers. As of this morning....I have lost 19.2 lbs. I have also lost 9.5 inches. Those numbers are amazing as I have not lost that kind of weight in many years, nor have the inches come off like that. The down side to this whole thing is that I had/have a significant amount of weight to lose on my little 5'1" frame. Even with those numbers, the progress although I can feel it, is not very noticable. I had before pictures to go along with all of this, but they were on my old phone and seem to be MIA at this moment. My son assures me he can find them. At any rate, for now......the progress seems to be more internal than external which tells me that I have a lot more work to do.

Thank God (literally) for the THM-Challenge Group on Facebook. Not resting on their laurels....they began a brand new challenge today which I needed desperately. It is the 2 Week No Cheat - Get Moving Challenge. This means working out at a sweat causing, muscle burning pace for at least 30 min. per day and absolutely no cheating. I got the no cheat thing down but I will definitely have to work on the 30 min. per day. God Bless Chrissy Benoit and her challenge group for being what I needed to prove to myself that I really can change my life......one fantastic meal at a time. 

So now I begin my new challenge. I will likely be blogging on Friday's for the next couple of weeks as that is the new weigh-in day. Wish me luck! And better than that....if you need a lifestyle change like I did....come and join me. Us mama's gotta stick together!

Happy 4th Everyone!!!!!!

A Little Determination.......and a Whole Lot of Prayer

Another week is in the books and this week was probably the most emotinally satisfying week so far. There were a lot of little NSV's and I hate to call them "little" because actually, any NSV at this point is monumental in my book.

This was the week that I realized that I was 40+ days into this plan and that I had no intentions of losing ground or falling back. I actually woke up in the middle of the night one night and had nothing short of an epiphany. Okay....granted, I woke up because I had to pee, BUT at that exact moment, when I popped up out of bed and didn't "struggle" to get up, I realized that I am really doing this! I am really losing weight and getting healthy!

Truthfully, no one except my son has said that they notice anything different in me. He says he can tell around my mid section. I can actually see it in my face, but I think maybe at this point, the change may not be as noticable on the outside as it is on the inside.

I feel different from my head to my toes.....literally. My headaches  that plagued me at least 12-15 times a month have gone to maybe 2-3 times  per month and they have been weather related. I have fought off and won over an impending sinus infection without going near an antibiotic. I move eaiser and I don't get winded after running up and down the stairs for the billionth time in a day. I actually have the energy to run up and down the stairs a billion times each day. My knees and hips no longer hurt and the horrible pains I would have in my feet in the middle of the night and the first thing in the morning are now non-existant.

As far as other NSV's go, I am now down to about a chin and a half instead of the tripple chin I was starting to sprout. I managed to make it 3 days this week on the elliptical working for 20 minutes on a fat burning workout. I also implemented arm and leg work outs to my regimine. I realized that I can comfortably cross my legs now and all my clothes are getting looser. And finally, I have managed to move down to a smaller size jeans once again. I am over the moon!

I think though, the biggest NSV for me came this week when my middle son asked me when I had a cheat day coming up. I just looked at him but my inner self was screaming "CHEAT DAY? What the heck are you trying to do to me?" I managed to calmly and with only a hint of hysteria in my voice. ask him why he was asking. Apparently he was craving a pre-THM dish that I used to make and wanted me to make it for him. Rather than cave and say we can do that, my mind went to work thinking how I could THMify the recipe so we could all  enjoy it. You know what....I figured it out! I think it was then that I realized that I am now not only eating differently, but I am also thinking differently about food. My mind has become a bit of a THM calculator, separating out fats from carbs and quickly changing a mainstream recipe into a THM recipe just by mentally rearranging the ingredients.

So it was a really good week mentally and today was my last "full week" weigh in of the Spring Fling Challenge. I had no hesitation approaching the scales this morning and as I looked down, I was greeted with another loss. My losses seem to be low numbers but steady results and I am good with that because all of those low numbers eventaully add up to a great big number and I know that with the path I am on, that big number is coming.

Today starts the last days of my challenge. June 30th, I will tally up all the numbers, check all the measurements and do the most telling thing of all.....take pictures. I am almost excited to see my befores and afters and to see if the change is really visable. Fingers crossed.

This has been the most rewarding few weeks that I have had in many years. I have proven some things to myself and finally I have counted myself worthy of the change I not only needed but also deserved. I am learning about me, my health and most of all..... that I can do anything with a little determination..... and a whole lot of prayer!

Week Five is Done

I am learning so much. It's true! I am learning about how to eat, why it's so important to eat right, the adverse affects of sugar and most of all......I am learning about myself and my body. It is a lot to learn in just a little over a month, but hopefully I will keep all that I am learning in mind as I continue to move forward.

One thing I have learned is that two people can follow the exact same plan and same menu and at the end of a week, can lose or not lose weight differently. I have seen lots of Mama's upset on the THM Facebook pages because they followed someone elses menus (who maybe dropped 3-5 lbs that week) but they either lost only a few 10ths of a pound, didn't move on the scale at all or even gained a bit. I know it is frustrating and it makes you crazy, but there are reasons for this.

Each of us is an individual and each of us loses individually....or differently. If you have 100-200 lbs to lose, those first weeks if you stick to plan, you are going to lose much faster than someone with say 20-50 lbs to lose. However, the more weight you lose and the farther along in weight loss you are, often times those pounds become more difficult to take off. You may have lost steadily for 3-4 months and then suddenly, your body plateaus and getting that scale to move is nearly impossible. That is why our Non-scale Victories (NSV's) are so important. They help us to focus on more than the numbers.

Sometimes when we add exercise into the mix, especially muscle building exercise such as weights, the scales will stall out or even go up a bit, even if we have not deviated from plan at all. While this is frustrating to see, the reality is that it is a good thing. It means that your body fat is being replaced by muscle and the more muscle you have the faster your metabolism is. This is why exercise is crucial to a healthy lifestyle.

So if you know you are doing it right, but your scales don't seem to be agreeing, don't fall apart, freak out or give up. Maybe it is time to change it up a bit. Add more aerobic (fat burning) exercise, or maybe you need to add a few extra E meals or throw in some extra FP's just to shake things up a bit. Your body really is improving. I promise.

As for my body.....I just finished up week 5 of the Spring Fling Challenge. I have one week and four day's left. This last week has been a bit rough for me. There have been a few stressors, it has been really hot and....well....in the past that would have been enough to "cut myself some slack" and let myself binge. I did not. I did have a few emotional hunger issues which I either relieved by eating a bit more at a meal or a couple of times I didn't wait the whole 3 hours before eating my next meal/snack for fear I would really eat something bad. Other than that though, I never went off plan. Still, I felt really bad about myself all week. This stressed me. I kept looking in the mirror looking for a difference and I couldn't see anything. In fact, I worried that this would be the week that the scales would turn on me completely and I would have failed myself.

Finally, after giving myself about a day to worry, feel sorry for myself and contemplate throwing it all in for a cheesecake and some fries, I kicked my own tail and gave myself some straight talk. So what if the scales said I gained. What was the worst thing that would happen? I couldn't have gained much because I have stayed on plan. So what is a pound or two? I am still way ahead of where I started and I needed to remind myself that I was in this for the long haul. It was then and there that I realized I was obsessing and that the scale was my guide and nothing more. I refused to allow it to become my obsession. From there I decided that the scales be damned, I wasn't going to quit and I wasn't going to go off plan, but I was going to start eating my way through the THM Cookbook. 

Each day I began trying something new from the cookbook and my obsession about the scales quickly turned to excitement over what I was going to fix next. I tried pancakes, syrup and ketchup. I have done the meatloaf and tacos and my all time favorite.....the cinnamon roll in a mug. When you eat like that you fill that void or need for comfort food which helps a little with my anxiety and stress (at least for me it does). The great thing is, afterwards.....I don't have to feel an ounce of guilt or remorse. It is win/win!

Another issue I had this last week was exercise. Not once did I take a walk, but I did get a nice NSV in by proving to myself that I could still last for a while on the elliptical. It was only 15 minutes, but then again....it WAS 15 minutes. After that though, other than house work and my daily activity, there was no exercise. This worried me too as I was eating VERY well with almost zero exercise. Yeah, last night rolled around and I was kind of dreading today. Still, before I went to bed, I made peace with whatever was going to show up on the scales this morning.

When the moment of truth hit, I was ready. Regardless of what that number read, I was still moving forward, sticking to plan and happy knowing that I refused to quit, give up or walk away. So as the mental drum roll began, I closed my eyes, held my breath and then just peeked one eye open. It was a loss! It wasn't a huge loss, but it was a loss and I was beyond happy. Yay me!

So I am embarking on my last full week of the challenge. I plan on continuing to work my way through the cookbook and hopefully this week, I will add a bit more exercise. I have a lot more weight to go and I can tell you that the end of this challenge will definitely not be the end of my time on THM. We are way past the habit stage of things and it is now how I choose to live my life from here on out.

Oh....and Happy Father's Day to all you dad's out there! :)

Perfection is Not Required

Perfection! The elusive dream that has stopped many a diet and lifestyle change, dead in its tracks. Why? Because we are human beings and sometimes as human beings we can be down right ridiculous.

Last I knew, there was only one perfect Person and none of us are Him. We strive to be our best in His image, but as faulty human beings, that is as close as we will ever come. That being said, it is this lack of imperfection that constantly pushes us, gives us life lessons and helps us to become the "imperfect" people we are suppose to be.

So if all of this is true, then why when it comes to weight loss and a healthy lifestyle, do we put the expectation of perfection on ourselves and make it  "do or die" if we fail in that perfection? Think about it. If you forget to wash laundry and everyone is out of underwear, yeah....it's a bit of setback for all involved, but do you never do laundry again because of that setback or do you forgive the situation and move forward? What if you forget to put gas in the car and you run out on your way to the store? Again, do you never drive, put gas in your car or go to the store again? OR do you just chalk it up to being a busy fallible human, who made a mistake? Of course you forgive yourself and move forward. So why can't we approach our fallibility during a lifestyle change and weight loss with the same forgiving nature. Why must a setback=a fail=a complete falling off the wagon? 

If we are honest without ourselves, we did not put weight on over night. For most of us, it has been a years long, dedicated effort. So if it took you six years and two pregnancies to put on 75 pounds, why would you possibly expect that weight to come off in a week, month or even six months?

Somewhere in our imperfect human brains, we believe that if the weight doesn't fall off over night and if we don't give complete and total perfection to our food plan and in turn the scales don't give us the reflection of that perfection then somehow we have failed (or the plan has failed us) and therefore we should just give up and eat cake.....and candy.....and a triple burger.....and an entire cheesecake....and on and on and on. This is our mind working against our body and often, that kind of mixed up sense of who we should be and how we should be doing things is what makes us our own worst enemy and our own biggest road block to success.

Weight loss and change will not happen until we are ready for it to happen....body, mind and spirit. Until that day when we know in the deepest part of us that we are ready for it, we will set ourselves up to fail and expect perfection out of an imperfect vessel. We will remain frustrated and unhappy with ourselves and continue to go down the path of unhealthy foods and eventually health issues brought on by our unhealthy habits. Sometimes it takes years of trying, failing and beating yourself up before you hit that magical place where you suddenly realized that weight loss is not a sprint to the finish line, but rather a slow and steady pace that leads you over rocky terrain, tough obstacles and even through some trying setbacks, but regardless.....you keep picking yourself up and moving forward. Always forward. The day when you finally realize that perfection is not necessary, only a belief in yourself, faith that you have the strength to finally love you enough to make a change and determination to see it through......regardless of what gets thrown in your path.....that is the day that you will begin to see real change.  

I hit that point on May 15, 2016 and the funny thing is, I didn't really know it at the time. All I knew was that I was tired of feeling like crap, feeling like I looked like crap and making myself miserable because I kept telling myself "I can't!" I decided that day to prove to myself once and for all that either I could lose weight and be healthy if I did what I was suppose to, or I would finally resign myself to being over weight, unhealthy and chances are.....ending up with some disease or illness brought on by the fact that I didn't care enough about myself to take care of myself.

Here we are a month later and I am still in the middle of the Spring Fling Challenge. I haven't veered from the plan once and trust me, this last week was a test of my fortitude. Along with my body, my home life is also changing. My world is very fluid right now and sometimes as a mom, caretaker, friend, etc. it gets overwhelming. I have become very well  aware of my triggers that throw me into a cheesecake frenzy or have me trying to buy Twinkies off the neighbohodr kids. I am learning to channel those triggers into more healthy outlets such as walking and praying. Yes....I pray a lot! It all seems to be working because even at my lowest point this last week, I stayed on plan and refused to allow myself to wallow, make excuses or quit. I have learned a lot of lessons about myself in this process and especially in the last seven days.

My reward for staying strong was a lower number on the scale. I am now in a place I haven't been in several years. I have also been enjoying some NSV's (non scale victories), from clothes fitting better, to my face thinning out. The biggest one this week though was.....I can comfortably cross my legs now!!!! It is amazing how much appreciation I have for the little things that come with this process.

No....I am not perfect on THM. There are meals that I know I probably eat more than I should, but I am hungry and I am eating on plan. I don't always exercise as I should and yes....as I said above, there are times when I think, "Wouldn't a burger, fries and shake be amazing right now?" That is when I decide whether I choose "me" or food. Whichever way I go, I know that three hours later I am back on track, but now I am choosing me. So I eat a burger wrapped in lettuce, some fried radishes and a cheesecake smoothie and I am taking care of me......without the slightest bit of deprivation!

So today is day 29. I have 18 days left. I don't plan on perfection whatsoever during these next 18 days, but I do plan on caring about myself enough to see this challenge through and hopefully within that time period, I pull a couple of more good numbers going south. Whatever happens though, I think I know me a little better now and know above all else....I deserve this!  And secure in this knowledge I am absolutely sure of one thing......perfection is not required! 

You Are Worth It!

So it's Sunday and today was weigh-in day. After last weeks weigh-in, I had pretty much prepared and coached myself to be happy with whatever the scale said. After all...I knew I had been sticking to the plan (minus one forgotten breakfast and one late night crossover which technically was still on plan). Still, I knew my body was changing and that there was every possibility that the scales had either not budged or quite possibly had only moved a few tenths of a pound like last week. This week though, there was a nice number on the minus side and I was very happy.

I may or may not have pointed out that I have been playing with THM for well over a year. I was on it full fledged for about a week right in the beginning, but then life hit and I let it be the excuse for me falling off the wagon. There have been a few starts and stops since that point and there have been times that I have been on plan about 50-60% of the time, but it wasn't until I saw the Spring Fling Challenge that something clicked inside of me.

Up until then, I had convinced myself that with my thyroid disease and being the care giver to my special needs son, that I would just never lose this weight. Actually, I convinced myself that I couldn't lose it. So when I put my son on THM with lots of crossovers and he started gaining weight and getting healthy, I knew that it was time his mama started losing weight and getting healthy too.

I can't really tell you why it is working for me this time or why I am so dedicated. Maybe it is that I finally understand the plan. I feel better about how it all works and I like the results I am seeing. Maybe it is because I am never hungry and sometimes have to force myself to eat because there is simply no deprivation in this plan at all. Maybe though, the reason everything is working this time is because it is my time. I finally quit making excuses and I am pushing myself to do things that I either didn't think I could do or simply didn't want to do previously.

As I read the THM Facebook pages, I see a lot of people saying...."I can't," or "I don't like" and making excuses as to why they aren't losing or why THM isn't working for them. The fact is, anyone can, you don't know if you like something until you try it and excuses help no one. They are simply making you bitter and frustrated while enabling you in whatever negative behaviors you are dealing with.

Quite honestly, in the beginning.....THM was the most frustrating and confusing plan I had ever been on. I didn't know my E's from my S's and fuggetaboutit when it came to FP's. I was totally lost. At that point in my life, I didn't see myself as worthy enough to take the time and figure out what I didn't understand, so I just gave up. I kept coming back though, because the food was delicious and fairly simple to make and I was absolutely in love with the drinks.

So this time, when the Spring Fling Challenge came up, I decided I could do anything for 6 weeks and it would be a true tell as to whether I could actually lose weight and if THM would really work for me. The proof is in the fact that I am still here and still plugging along half way through the challenge.

This week I have also been blessed with some NSV's (non scale victories). I have continued to increase my walking and since last Sunday, I have walked almost 15 miles. I took a picture of my face and posted it on Facebook. I had several call me out on this and say that they couldn't see my body. The fact is, my body is not near as hard for me to post a picture of as my face is. Anyone who knows me knows this. However, I did take a full body picture the day I started this challenge and I plan on taking another one on June 30th. THEN I will post the pictures and we shall see. I also was able to comfortably fit into a size 14 jean this week. That hasn't happened in a long while. Finally.....today....I am in the last digits of a number that I haven't seen in years. Next week if I have continued to move the scale south, I will be at a weight that I haven't been at in 15 years.

While I can't make anyone give THM a fair chance, I can encourage you to give it a try. Yes, if you purchase the first book, it will leave you scratching your head and wondering what the heck you have gotten yourself into. However, if you also purchase the cookbook and join some of the THM Facebook pages, it all becomes much easier and much clearer. Through Facebook, there are always people willing to answer your questions and help you piece together what you don't understand.

I am happy today, but then again.....I have been happy since I started this challenge. I am happy with me, my goals and my determination and believe me.....that is not a feeling I have had about myself in a very long time.

Until next time.....have a wonderful day and remember.....YOU ARE WORTH IT!